Not Wants, But Needs: Van Edition
by Jason Cork
Sometimes, coaches will tell athletes what they “need” – a new pair of klister skis, a functional helmet, a drink belt – but rarely do coaches get told what they need. Let me rectify this situation with “Not Wants, But Needs: Van Edition.” I’d like to say this will become a series, but right now I’ve only come up with one other blog to address needs vs. wants.
If you have a van for your team, or even if you just drive your car to practices and races, there are some things you must have. Pay attention: This will be part of USSA’s Level 200 coaches education.
First, you need some sunflower seeds. If you’re actually coaching, and not just training with some kids, you’ll eventually find yourself standing around watching other people. “Seeds” (as baseball players and those in the know call them) allow you to look busy even if you aren’t actively moving. Also, 1 2/3 cups have 270 calories, so if you didn’t eat breakfast you won’t waste away.
Also needed: Gigantic can of energy drink. Duh. Caffeine to boost the metabolism, and sugar-free, ‘cause if you aren’t actually training, you’re probably just getting fat.
In the South, they call all sweet, carbonated beverages “Cokes,” and in the van, so do I, even though these are clearly Pepsis. When it’s hot and/or the workouts are long, our crew likes to drink these. I saw some guy drinking a can of Coke in the Tour de France, so I think it’s OK that we do it too. Also, when the coach runs out of dangerous energy drink (or, in the even he actually trains for more than 15 minutes), these are tasty.
Some sort of music player thing is obligatory, as is an adapter to get the music from your iPod/record player to the terrible factory-installed speakers.
Sidewalk chalk is good to have, if nothing else so you can write amusing directions on the pavement. [Amusing to me, at least.]
A tiny, cheap computer is especially helpful. Sometimes you can show athletes important graphs from VO2 tests. Other times, you can type up time-trial results and figure percent back while riding in the van. But most importantly, if the athletes are doing a long workout and you’re driving support, you can write an overdue blog posting.
[Tiny and cheap is important because, eventually, you will spill your huge energy drink on the keyboard.]
Next time: “Not Wants, But Needs: Home Edition.”
Kevin Johnson 9:37 pm on September 6, 2010 Permalink |
Cork, I recommend the “Lo Carb Rockstar” better flavor, still calorie free so you don’t have to worry about get’n fat. Keep up the great work makin’ the kids go fast!
TFS 9:28 am on September 7, 2010 Permalink |
You forgot the USSA rules and regulation book if you ever feel like you need a nap, even after a bottle of Rockstar.
Patrick Stinson 11:01 pm on September 8, 2010 Permalink |
Plastered Skier says: Don’t forget to post the uncensored version for high school club coaches (and people just training with a bunch of kids). Post requests accepted daily at above address.
Got to keep those kids in line…